Day 16: What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?
For me it is always that balance of my submissive side and my feminist side, that I can can be both without making either of those parts of me less.
To me feminism is not a split of the genders, but that it should not be a deciding factor or consideration of our society. That means no difference between “womens” or “mens” work, that it’s based on the ability that one has.
All my life I have been surrounded by strong women and looked up to them. Though it wasn’t until recently that I really considered myself a ‘feminist’ of any kind and that was far after I identified as a Submissive. So there was a time that I thought perhaps it was wrong that I was both. That maybe I was letting down those strong women in my life by being submissive. I even had thoughts for a while that I couldn’t really voice my opinions on women’s rights because they would be taken less then serious because of how I choose to express my sexuality behind closed doors.
However, in time I started to learn that both are fine to be. That by embracing my submissive nature I am taking control of my sexuality. That I can admit it is truly what I want and that because I know how to negotiate with my partner that it’s not endangering anyone. Because if there is no issues with men going for what they desire, there is nothing wrong with a woman doing it either. It fits with my thoughts of BDSM because to me its about finding that partner that we can best express ourselves with on both ends be we Dominant or Submissive. That no one is less equal then the other.