So today Write Sex Right tweeted out about a hashtag of #sexbloggersare after an experience at the Mumsnet Blogfest, in which the host of the a panel where sex blogging was compared to a flasher on the street. Needless to say this got quite a reaction and I sent my tweet out for this, which you can see in their full article.
However it got me thinking more on what I said.
Sex bloggers are not always who you would suspect them to be.
If you where to meet me on the street, I am certain your first impression would not be ‘this girl blogs about sex, sex toys, kink and erotica. Upon first meeting I am shy and as some people would describe me rather sweet. I am rather quiet until you get to know me and even then when I do talk about things that are of a more ‘adult’ perspective I still don’t general ping on people’s radars for someone who is really in-depth with it. Hell when I have told my story to my coworkers, even they always seem a bit shocked (especially when they find out I have worked for a phone sex line!)
Yes, sex bloggers love sex and enjoy writing about it. But you know what we love even more, we love consensual sex, which flashing is NOT. Flashing is the act of forcing your nudity upon someone in a situation that they cannot do anything about it. I remember my experience, one night riding a very crowded El train home from downtown. I had one of the few single seats that you could find in the corner of a car. The only other seat was one that was across from me that a man was sitting at. I remember reading my book, then when I looked up for a moment he had pulled his penis from his sweat pants and was looking right at me. I couldn’t even make a sound, mostly because I was very certain in my mind that if I yelled out anything…no one would believe me by the time they turned around. That I would look like a strange woman who was accusing a rather innocent looking man of doing something so horrible for attention. I felt that way because well…that is pretty much how the world would have seen me. Today, sure I would have had more guts and instead of just looking shocked I just might have said something to embarrass him back like…
“I own bigger at home.” or “You might want to have that mole checked out…”
But I can only look back on it and think about doing it, which while feels good doesn’t totally wipe it from my memory. But I know from experiance that what I do on this blog is nothing like that, I am not forcing anyone to read what I write. I simply write because its what I love to do.