Wicked Wednesday: Small Minded Discussions

It has been a little over a week or so since I have moved back to IL, and living with my parents has been interesting. Especially where the factor of my 18-year-old cousin’s 19-year-old boyfriend is concerned. Things started out easily enough with him, I could look past the fact that he was a fan of ICP or that he has a slight infatuation with wanting to ‘box people’. But he couldn’t keep his opinions to himself for long. I had been warned by my older cousin about this, but being that I have never been one to shy away from what I would have thought would be a good discussion. How bad could it really be.

When I was unpacking my toys I got to hear about how, sex toys where nasty. My brain started to worry how bad his opinions where going to get right then and there. But I allowed more discussions to happen. We had a really good one about smoking weed and other drugs, while I have never done it I wasn’t going to throw him under the bus for doing it. My spirits raised that we could talk like normal human beings.

Yeah that didn’t last long.

I have now heard his opinion on the President (with racial slurs tossed into it), about gay marriage and the one that nearly sent me flying across to room at him…

“Any woman who shows too much skin, is a whore.”

Now, I have been the bigger person when he spouts these opinions, either not saying anything. Or attempting to educate him with facts and my knowledge that I have picked up over my 30 years of life on this great earth. The discussions start off well with each of us giving our points, but you can’t really continue with someone when their endgame to it all is…and I quote:

“I don’t give a shit what people think. I am going to think what I want to think.”

He has no facts or basis for half of his opinions other than they are his own thoughts. It makes me want to shake my poor cousin and scream at her what the fuck she is doing with such a closed-minded little twit. Of whom he gives a hard time for her having a girlfriend in the past with his ‘its just nasty’ remarks. It makes me want to punch him half the time as well and had led me to be rather quiet around him in the house for a day or so. Until I just got very Honey Badger about it all. Pulling out my toys to review while he is in the room to take pictures or just have with me like I always do to take notes. Happily watching Ru Paul’s Drag race and other Logo TV shows that I like to keep him out of the room. Don’t get me wrong, I am not trying to scare him away or to be a bitch. But I cannot stop my life and being who I am for one person who is currently sleeping on my parents couch. At this point I would still be happy to discuss things with him. But how do you discuss things with someone who is being so closed-minded that it seems like the hinges on his brain are rusted shut.

I know that I am far more open-minded because of the way I was raised. So I can only assume that his views are in part from the same. But even I in slowly growing up and discussing things with people learned that my way, wasn’t the only way. I can only hope that either he learns the same one day when he grows older. That or hope that whatever rousing discussions we get into over the next few months causes some of those hinges to loosen and open up his mind a little further. The only advice I think I could ever bestow upon him should be that maybe he needs to live more than 19 years of life and then really think about the opinions that he has.

I know this isn’t as erotic as my past submissions to Wicked Wednesay, but I thought it fit the theme of the week which was Discussion. Perhaps those who read this might have some advice for me on dealing with this or maybe there is something in my own thoughts I am wrong about. I would love to hear them!

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About scarletrosefox

A late 20's kinky geek. Submissive. Bisexual. Writer. Lover of Corsets. Reviewer.
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7 Responses to Wicked Wednesday: Small Minded Discussions

  1. There’s nothing wrong with your thoughts (although I’m a tad biased here, as I share them!). The cousin’s boyfriend sounds like a closed-minded douche, and I don’t know that anything can force him to open that mind – except himself.

    Unfortunately it sounds like he’s already got your questioning yourself – I wonder (and worry) about the impact he’s having on your cousin. Are your parents being any support in this?

    xx Dee

    • My parents are, mostly in the they are allowing her to make her own decisions and learn from them. But at the same time point things out to her that are just not so good about him. But even I can see that he is starting to seriously grate on her.

      And he did, though I know my questioning came from also having been tired thanks to moving and so my brain has been off as it is. I was able to take a few days and just build up my minds strength again thankfully.

  2. KaziG says:

    There’s something about the age 19 that sets my teeth on edge. Maybe it’s knowing that at that age I was still so confused about gender and sexual preferences. Maybe it’s that my first husband left me at age 30 for a 19-year-old bimbo. Maybe it’s the 19-year-old that my sister took up with for a period of time. Dunno. But I still don’t consider that age to be particularly mature despite their attitudes of superiority.
    I hope there’s a lot of discussion going on for the sake of your cousin, so that she can keep her eyes wide open about what she’s walking into.

    ~Kazi xxx

  3. aandm69 says:

    You are SO much more patient than I am. If it were me, your cousin would be spending a great deal of her time helping him remove duct tape from his mouth (lol). I’m joking… maybe 😀

    Seriously though, it’s a shame that at 19 he’s so sure that he has everything figured out that he’s gone ahead and closed his mind to any new input. No room for personal growth at all. All you can do is hope that as he ages he’ll at least learn to respect other peoples’ opinions and choices too.


  4. l0rdraven says:

    Ah the wonderful wisdom of youth. You can’t win because they are always right, even when they are putting themselves in harms way. Tell them to not stand in front of the train what do they do? yep stand there and get hit. I hope he wakes up and opens him mind enough to make it in life. I hope you don’t have to strangle him…lol
    Thank you for sharing.

  5. Thinking back on when I was 19 and what I new then and thinking about what I know now, it is clear that at 19 I knew nothing. Absolutely nothing and definitely not enough to have opinions on things like gender and sexual preferences. Like Kazi said, at that age, we were all confused.

    I hope that through calm discussions you can get him to understand that he needs a lot of life experience before he can be so set on his opinions.

    Rebel xox

  6. Thane Flynn says:

    Firstly, I enjoyed the article and think it was a great choice of topic on your part. I think you have the correct perspective and shouldn’t change anything. As far as your cousin’s boyfriend I doubt that you could change anything about his closed mindedness. I think that develops early on. I have a brother in law of that stripe and he never seems to change his narrow views.

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